I’ve been thinking a lot lately about life—I get sentimental like that sometimes ;).
When I look back on the hardest trials in my life, it’s interesting how at the time I didn’t know why it all had to happen, but I can see the beauty in the trials as I look back, and sometimes, I can see the “why’s” as well.
Do you ever find yourself landed on a blog that makes you cry like a baby because the person has had to go through such incredible trials? I have a few blogs that are so inspiring to me because they have gone through some of the hardest things I can imagine (or things that I didn’t even know existed).
My dear sister, her wonderful husband, and their 6 amazing kids are going through the fire right now. My heart aches for them as I see the struggles they are experiencing that were so unexpected.
Yet the beauty of life and the fact that people are amazing shine through every trial. To see family and friends pull together, praying and doing whatever they can to help. To see the amount of hardship that a person can handle…it’s amazing. People are amazing.
Life is hard. Things happen that don’t always make sense and just might never…but there is beauty in hardship.
I don’t share very many personal stories on my blog, but my heart has been overflowing with gratitude towards health care professionals. So I’m going to share…
I think about my sweet little B being born. I knew something wasn’t right with her head shape…after searching online and her getting a CAT scan, it was confirmed that she had craniosynostosis, the fusing of some of her skull bones. Part of her skull would need to be removed surgically. Definitely not a huge deal compared to so many other things that can happen to your child, but it was still a trial for us. A really hard trial. We handed off our sweet, 2 month old Little B to the skilled doctors and prayed for the best. I loved that there were amazing people that we could hand her off to—people who care so much about helping others that they make it their profession. Again—amazing people.
Looking back even further to my second child being born c-section. It was meant to be. I know it was. I probably didn’t need to have a c-section with him—but I strongly believe it was so that they were more cautious when I wanted to have a normal delivery with B. She was under too much stress so she was born via c-section as well. Since then, I’ve read countless stories of the labor being horrible when the baby has craniosynostosis (often ending up in c-sections) because the bones in their head don’t shift and mold how they are supposed to, and can possibly even crack their skull during birth. Scary stuff.
During the time of preparing for her surgery, and then during and after her surgery, I felt the love of my Heavenly Father. During that trial, I felt the love of my family and friends. During that trial, I felt peace as I handed my little girl over to the doctor. When I saw her next she looked like this:
During that trial, I broke down in tears so many times wondering why my little girl had to go through so much pain and why I had to stand by feeling so helpless. And even though that answer isn’t fully understood by me, I do understand that it is part of life. Because it is when I look back over hard times that I can more fully enjoy the world around me as it is now. I can see God’s hand throughout the trial as I look back.
Today, I am so grateful for living where we do, with excellent health care. I really believe that I have them to thank for my children’s lives—my first son had the cord wrapped around his neck when he was born and had difficulty breathing for the first few hours after birth. My second son D had his appendix rupture when he was 4, which, in a nut-shell, basically poisons your body very quickly. Who knows what would have happened to B if she was not a c-section.
Yes, hard times–but hard times that have made my family who we are today. It helps me look around and feel very content in my life when the going isn’t as tough as it could be. Hopefully I’ll use the “downtime” I have to help those who are going through their tough times!